I can not start this without acknowledging the devasting loss that happened after the wedding. Words can not describe my anguish, sadness, and loss of one of my best friends and mentors. I am so happy that I was able to spend her last 48 hours with her. She told me as she said goodbye that it had been the best night of her life!! I know she meant it and I know she was able to spend quality time with so many people she loved. I honestly can not even talk about it but I know that Germaine would be so mad at me if I let it consume me like it wants to so I will not give it power and will celebrate the amazing Mama G!!!!
So last we left off I was getting ready to start WBRT - whole brain radiation treatment. I completed 10 sessions on December 16, 2016. Radiation was actually pretty easy. Ha, the hardest part was honestly parking at UCLA! I chose to go to UCLA instead of Cedars since the radiologist there suggested we miss my hippocampus's to try and spare my memory, emotions, and spatial navigation etc. Yep...mouth full I know. Ha, with all of these steroids I'm on I feel it didn't work! I'll just blame me being short-tempered, bloated, just overall pissy on roid rage!
After completing the radiation both of my oncologists agreed I could take a break from everything. My goal was to enjoy the holidays and get ready for Super Bowl!!
Holidays were nice and mellow. I have to admit I missed visiting everyone in TX but it was really nice to not have to travel and be able to lay low!
OK...so Super Bowl and what the heck happened to me after?!?!!? First of Super Bowl was amazing! It was incredible and a lot of hard work but worth every second! I managed the backstage and the B Party Hair & Makeup. We had 40 dancers, 5 band members, 4 BGV, and a hair and makeup team of 20. Needless to say, it was a ton to coordinate but when you are working with amazing professionals it really doesn't feel like a job! I'm always in aw of the pure talent and creative genius I'm constantly surrounded by.
So, let's talk about what happened next! Not really sure actually. I arrived in Houston on Jan 28th. Tried to go to Chuy's with my parents and was only able to eat a little bit of queso and chips. This should have clued me into something was going on but I just thought it was a travel day and my body wasn't used to it etc. I was super bummed I wasn't able to eat my taco's!!!
Anyway, crazy busy and running around for the next week. I was feeling weak but it really is amazing how you can really just make yourself keep pushing forward. The mind is an amazing thing! I'm sure everyone would love details on SB but for length and my energy purposes, this will just be a health update. Just know SB was as awesome as you think it would be :)
So, I knew I just needed to get to the 6th! At this point, I'm not eating at all and throwing up every few hours. All while keeping it from everyone around me :( but handling my biz and making it happen!
However, by the time I get to my parent on the 6th I'm exhausted and basically didn/t couldn't get out of bed for days. I really hoped to visit with more people I just wasn't up for it. Then the vertigo hit! Man..I swear ill take a migraine headache over vertigo any day. At this point, I just wanted to get home and be done with everything. Let's just say the plane ride was horrible and even the drive to get me home sucked. I knew I was sick but I wasn't aware of how sick I was. I had been seeing this crazy Dr. in SF and he just kept telling me it would pass. Luckily I am no longer seeing or listening to him because this was not something that would just pass!
The next few days honestly are a total blur and I do not remember. They talked me into letting them call an ambulance and I spent the next few days in ICU and the hospital fighting a blood infection. We are not 100% sure where or how it happened but I do a bile stent replacement every 3 months and their biggest warning is acquiring an infection so I guess that answers that!
Unfortunately, the time spent in bed in TX and in the hospital really took its toll on me physically and my leg muscles have completely atrophied. It's kind of crazy how quickly it happened. I literally can not stand up on my own without help or the use of a walker. So what does that mean and what is going on with me daily?!?! Well, when my health started to decline a few months ago Kat Thomas came on full time as my assistant. Just overall life saver and honestly really stepped up and took over my responsibilities at the Warehouse and helped things keep moving when Gaga didn't want me to work at all. Now we know that's not possible but I love and respect that she wanted me to just focus on my health and getting better. Ok, so anyway....Kat in no way signed up to be a caregiver, but as you do when you care about someone and are professional you step up and do what needs to be done. When we were getting ready to come home from the hospital we realized how sick I really was we made the decision that we needed to bring in professional help. As much as I hate to admit it that meant 24-hour nursing/staff. It has been an adjustment but I have a nurses that rotate in 12-hour shifts. We have also put together a Palliative care team. Palliative you say? Yes, I had a real issue with this concept and word. Just like Hospice. Makes me think they are just getting me comfortable to die. HOWEVER, It was explained to me that Palliative care is the opposite, it's a team that is doing everything they can to make me comfortable and gives me all of the tools to get stronger so I can fight this, win, and survives!!!! So not to keep dragging this on but the Palliative team has really changed my thoughts on pain management and has put an entire team together. Physical therapy, Dietician, nursing staff, all of the tools that I need a shower chair, breathing treatments, I really could go on and on with everything I'm having to do to just survive at the moment but just know I'm fighting every day and with the help of a very large team I know it can happen!! Honestly, if it wasn't for Gaga and the financial contributions from everyone so far I really do not think I would be here. Let's just say I understand why people give up and die because they do not have the resources that I have been given. It's really given me some thought on starting a non-profit.
Anyway..more on that later!!
Now a quick blurb on the most amazing day of our life :) Our awesome wedding!!!! Believe it or not, it was a fight and almost didn't happen. Literally why it was planned and pulled off in two weeks! Yes, two weeks! Now you can do that when you have amazingly talented event friends and an Angel that tell you she is going to throw you your dream wedding and there are no arguments. So I cried and cried and if you can believe it let go of total control (i know crazy right) sent them my Pinterest and just asked when they wanted me to show up!!!! Ha, ill do a facebook post at some point soon that will honestly look like a sponsor list! So many friends stepped up and donated time, services, product, you name it. The universe literally came together to give us our dream wedding and there is no way I could truly acknowledge and thank everyone for it. So...here are the links so you can enjoy the pictures showing the amazing gift we were given from so many people!!!
Password for guests: sonjaandandres
no password needed
Well, it's time for my breathing treatment! I hope this gives you an insight into how things are. Honestly, I've got good days and bad. It is what it is but I'm hanging in there. It's taken me three days to even write this but I know everyone loves me and just wants to have an idea of what is going on. I promise to continue to do my best, to be honest, and keep everyone in the loop!
oh...I am doing Chemo, I have one last treatment on next Thursday. Other than mouth ulcers which suck it's actually been pretty easy! I also did another MRI while I was in the hospital and everyone else thinks it's good news! I say everyone else because the tumors are a little smaller and there are no new additional lesions. I know, I should be happy and I am but i had expected or I guess had hoped that the brain radiation would have taken care of them. I will take the small miracles I get and be grateful for the positive news!!!!
Ok...now I really need to wrap up!!!! Ha I love you all and I will do my best to give more updates. As of now, I'm still seeing limited people until my white cell counts are little higher!
xoxoxox, love you all
I loved this wonderful update! Even though I have been there through most of this I still always have questions. So thanks for being so thorough on the update. I love you and how hard you're fighting. You're going to make it through all of this, and we will all be right here with you darlin! Much love, Mermaid
ReplyDeleteSo happy for you Sonja, you deserve all the happiness in the world and you looked stunning!
ReplyDeletelots of love,
Francesco (Little Monster from Italy)
Hey Sonja i just want you to know that no matter what happens we are here with you and rooting for you every single day. You are such a warrior and you should know that. Stay strong and keep fighting. We know you can!
ReplyDeletexoxo, Love you!
WE LOVE YOU
ReplyDeleteBeing alive is a series of unanswered questions. I've learned that all the way. You seem like such a gorgeous human being inside and out. I don't know what decided that you should live through what you're living. But here's an answer to a question that was never asked. I love you Sonja.
ReplyDeleteRead your blog through and through from the beginning up until this last update. I'm deeply moved by your story and I want you to know that starting tonight you will be in my daily prayers. You've got this, Sonja. We are all rooting for you.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteWe have always known what a survivor and how strong you are. You faced your challenge and now your soul rests in peace. Your spirit lifts us up reading your blog today. Love you and Bill and Anita so sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteYou are such a kind soul. Your blog has inspired me in outstanding levels, to the point that I aspire to do with my life what you've done with yours: try to help others be strong while sharing your own story. You are an angel and I know you will be right up there taking care of us all. You've always been an angel. Take care now Sonja, you don't need to worry anymore. Xoxo
ReplyDeleteRIP Sonja, you were such a fighter, Grigio Girls <3 Prayers to your work family, your husband and your Mom and Dad. Wish I could see your wedding pics, password didn't work, I know you looked beautiful as always!
ReplyDeleteHi Sweet Angel...Thank you for everything....thank you Xx
ReplyDeleteMy prayers go out to your family and friends....the story you left behind is full of inspiration and hope.
ReplyDeleteHi Sonja - Re-read your blog since my close friend was just diagnosed. I could hear your voice as I read and it made me feel so good and sad because I miss you. I think re-reading this will help guide me in helping my friend.
ReplyDeleteWOW ALL THANKS TO DR WILLIAMS Am paul,i once suffered from the problem of weak erection and death sperm count,which my family doctor could not cured,and it was affecting my home,i had to search the net for a solution,then i came across the contact of a DOC,Dr williams who help in the cure of weak erection and premature ejaculation,i got his contact,i never believe he could help me,but now am completely free from the problem,i gave him all the details he need to know about me,and i got the medication,which i took for some days,now am completely free from it,if you have such problem on it or impotency,you can contact him through his email on drwilliams098675@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteAs a sign of gratitude for how my wife was saved from CANCER, i decided to reach out to those still suffering from this.
ReplyDeleteMy wife suffered cancer in the year 2013 and it was really tough and heartbreaking for me because she was my all and the symptoms were terrible, she always complain of abnormal vaginal bleeding, and she always have pain during sexual intercourse. . we tried various therapies prescribed by our neurologist but none could cure her. I searched for a cure and i saw a testimony by someone who was cured and so many other with similar body problem, and he left the contact of the doctor who had the cure to cancer . I never imagined cancer. has a natural cure not until i contacted him and he assured me my wife will be fine. I got the herbal medication he recommended and my wife used it and in one months time she was fully okay even up till this moment she is so full of life. cancer. has a cure and it is a herbal cure contact the doctor for more info on drwilliams098675@gmail.com on how to get the medication. Thanks for reading my testimony.
As a sign of gratitude for how my wife was saved from CANCER, i decided to reach out to those still suffering from this.
My wife suffered cancer in the year 2013 and it was really tough and heartbreaking for me because she was my all and the symptoms were terrible, she always complain of abnormal vaginal bleeding, and she always have pain during sexual intercourse. . we tried various therapies prescribed by our neurologist but none could cure her. I searched for a cure and i saw a testimony by someone who was cured and so many other with similar body problem, and he left the contact of the doctor who had the cure to cancer . I never imagined cancer. has a natural cure not until i contacted him and he assured me my wife will be fine. I got the herbal medication he recommended and my wife used it and in one months time she was fully okay even up till this moment she is so full of life. cancer. has a cure and it is a herbal cure contact the doctor for more info on drwilliams098675@gmail.com on how to get the medication. Thanks for reading my testimony.
ALL THANKS TO DR WILLIAMS WITH HIS HERBAL PORTION I WAS COMPLETELY CURED FROM BREAST CANCER.
ReplyDeleteI'm here again to appreciate. DR WILLIAMS God will always continue to bless you more abundantly, for the good works you done in my life, I will always keep on writing good and posting my testimonies about you on the Internet, I’m Jessica from Orlando, Florida. I was tested breast cancer positive, I saw a blog on how DR WILLIAMS cured people with his herbal portion, i did not believe in natural medicine but i just decided to give him a try, I contacted him,and explain my situation to him,few day later he sent me the herb, after taking doc Williams herbal medicine for few week i also got my healing with his herbal portion, i am so happy. If you have any type of cancer problem ,you can contact him on Drwilliams098675@gmail.com for advice and for his product,i hope this testimony also help some one out there .
WHAT A GREAT MIRACLE THAT I HAVE EVER SEE IN MY LIFE. My names are David
ReplyDeleteClara I’m a citizen of USA, My younger sister was sicking of
breast cancer and her name is David Sandra I and my family have taking her
to all kind of hospital in USA still yet no good result. I decided to go to
the internet and search for cancer cure so that was how I find a lady
called peter Lizzy she was testifies to the world about the goodness of a
herbal man who has the root and half to cure all kind of disease and the
herbal man email was there. So I decided to contact the herbal man for my
younger sister help to cure her breast cancer. I contacted him and told him
my problem he told me that I should not worry that my sister cancer will be
cure, he told me that there is a medicine that he is going to give me that
I will cook it and give it to my sister to drink for one week, so I ask how
can I receive the cure that I am in USA, he told me
That I will pay for the delivery service. The courier service can
transport it to me so he told me the amount I will pay, so my dad paid for
the delivery fee. two days later I receive the cure from the courier
service so I used it as the herbal man instructed me to, before the week
complete my sister cancer was healed and it was like a dream to me not
knowing that it was physical I and my family were very happy about the
miracle of Doctor so my dad wanted to pay him 5 million us dollars the
herbal man did not accept the offer from my dad, but I don't know why he
didn't accept the offer, he only say that I should tell the world about him
and his miracle he perform so am now here to tell the world about him if
you or your relative is having any kind of disease that you can't get from
the hospital please contact dr.sakuraspellalter@gmail.com/ drsakuraspellalter.wordpress.com or whatsapp him
+2348110114739 for the cure, he will help you out with the
problem. And if you need more information about the doctor you can mail me
davidclara223@gmail.com or whatsApp me +1(209)2621918
Why are everyone looking for ways online to get help solving their pregnancy and infertility problems when most of every native American is talking online about the help of Dr Mandaker Alamun. I checked him out when my husband who could not get me pregnant for over 9 years of marriage as a result of low sperm count became fertile and now, I am 5 months pregnant and it is this man known as Dr Mandaker who helped my husband solve his problem. My name is Alecia Maldonado from CA USA. I would advise anyone and everyone who needs the help of any spell caster in love marriage,finance, job promotion,lottery spell,poker spell,golf spell,Law & Court case Spells,money spell,weigh loss spell,diabetic spell,hypertensive spell,high cholesterol spell,Trouble in marriage,Barrenness(need spiritual marriage separation),good Luck, Money Spells,it's all he does or looking for breakthrough in your political career to meet this Dr Mandaker the link to his website copy this link (witch-doctor.page4.me) for He is a Reliable and trustworthy. I and my husband have gone to different hospitals having the thinking that I was at fault for not getting pregnant. But at the Federal hospital, they examined him too and his sperm count was low and unable to get a woman pregnant as a result of male infertility. It was then I sort out,thanks to Dr Mandaker.
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